Self assessment

We all have our daily challenges, developing a business or career, raising a family, growing a meaningful relationship and staying healthy and positive can be exhausting as well as a bit of a balancing nightmare.

Deciding what kind of person you wish to aspire to be or what goals you wish to accomplish takes clarity of mind, a willingness to look carefully and honestly at yourself, and the courage and commitment to work on the changes.

Yes, there is external influences but to take full responsibility for things which happen to us is a lot to ask but it is also very empowering. I know naturally the tendency to look outside for reasons or excuses is tempting. Although there are clearly times when external forces can slow us down or throw us off track, self growth and personal success starts personally with ones self. You have the power within you to make the changes and have the growth you deserve.

10 Hinderance to Self growth

1 ) Fear:

It may sound obvious that fear would be number one on the list but many people don’t experience it that way. They may rationalize their reluctance to make changes by interpreting their excuses as valid reasons. It is often only through taking an honest personal inventory or thorough self-examination that a person realizes that his/her fears have been driving them.

2 ) Denial:

Others may have suggested that you need to change (maybe you’re too angry or stubborn) but you are not hearing it. You prefer living in your own world of fiction despite what people close to you (and even, perhaps the little voice inside your head) have said. Personal growth will not be possible if you think it is unnecessary for you to make changes.

3 ) Pride:

There’s nothing wrong with being proud, as in being proud of your accomplishments. However when someone has an inordinate opinion of his own importance and carries a sense of superiority over others, it will prevent him from keeping an open mind about change and growth. Pride sometimes prevents people from being willing to admit they made a mistake, thereby learning from the experience.

4 ) Defensiveness:

Being overly defensive is a signal to others of your insecurity. A person who is excessively concerned with guarding himself against real or imagined criticism is not able to grow. His defensiveness closes him down and he becomes a prisoner in his own prison.

5 ) Not taking responsibility:

Repeatedly blaming others or circumstances for what happens in your life is a way of avoiding your own responsibility. To experience self-growth you have to be ready to take the heat. Blaming others can create the conflict you need to deflect the focus away from you and onto someone else.

6 ) Lack of self-discipline:

If you have lofty ideas about the things you would like to achieve and the person you would like to become but lack the self-discipline to accomplish those things, you will always be disappointed in yourself. There is no reaching the top if you are not willing to make the climb.

7 ) Lack of motivation:

It is easy to say that you would like to do something (for example: exercise, learn a language or get better at being in a relationship) but until you understand why you want to do something you will likely not accomplish it. Being truly motivated creates a powerful force or drive that can propel you to achieve what you want. Many people just think they should want something and create a fantasy around the thought. Try answering this: What do you want that you really cannot live without?

8 ) Lack of goals:

It is the old story of: “If you don’t know where you are going, how are you going to get there?” To achieve growth you need to know what you want and map out a course to get it. Many people resist creating and writing down goals often because they have simply not gotten into the habit. Start small and build your goal setting skills.

9 ) Negative/Pessimistic attitude:

This is not the same as having healthy skepticism. Having a negative/pessimistic attitude creates an internal state where few, if any, options exist. Expectations of only the worst sort of outcomes cloud the mind and hamper the possibilities of growth. The spirit is drained of inspiration and the person is stuck. Learning to create a healthier attitude will open up your options.

10 ) Lack of support:

If you surround yourself with negative/pessimistic people you are unlikely to achieve personal growth. If you do not have a good support system you should try to develop one. It is hard to go it alone. To achieve good and great things in your life you need the support of good and great people.

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